Readers--I watched a lot of movies in January! The theme of the month seems to be "dark" as most of these films fall into the dark comedy, intense drama, or straight-up horror categories.
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The Apartment
This 1960 comedy is directed by Billy Wilder and stars Jack Lemmon and Shirley MacLaine. Lemmon plays Baxter, an office worker who allows his bosses the use of his apartment as a place where they can go to cheat on their wives. He develops a crush on Fran (MacLaine), the elevator operator, who is the mistress of Sheldrake (Fred MacMurray), a bigwig who uses Baxter's apartment. The movie takes a very dark turn when Sheldrake takes Fran to Baxter's apartment on Christmas and basically treats her like a whore--giving her a "Christmas present" of $100 before leaving to be with his wife. Fran attempts to overdose on Baxter's sleeping pills and Baxter finds her before she dies and manages to get the doctor next door to revive her. As Fran recovers over the next couple days in Baxter's home, the two grow closer.
Damn y'all, this was a good movie. And I was not expecting the suicide scene to be so intense. Jack Lemmon is known for playing goofballs, but he really brings out the dramatic acting chops during the suicide/recovery scene. The Apartment reminds me a lot of Mad Men--but the parts of Mad Men where the characters suffer for their poor choices. If you're looking for a movie that doesn't romanticize the mid-twentieth century and shows that people were just as horny, drunk, sad, and cruel back then as they are today, this is your movie!
Grade: A-
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In the Heat of the Night
Speaking of people being cruel in the mid-twentieth century... In the Heat of the Night is a 1967 crime movie directed by Norman Jewison and starring the indomitable Sidney Poitier as Virgil Tibbs, a homicide detective from Philadelphia traveling through Sparta, Mississippi to visit his mother. When a rich local man is murdered, Tibbs is arrested for basically being Black and near the body. When Chief of Police Bill Gillespie (Rod Steiger) realizes Tibbs is innocent and also, like, really really good at being a homicide detective, he asks him (with the insistence of the dead man's widow) to stay and help them with the case.
Only problem is that Tibbs is Black and this is Mississippi in the 1960s. So Tibbs is constantly in danger of being killed by the hicks in town. Poitier has this badass scene where they visit this rich racist and the racist slaps Tibbs and then Tibbs slaps him back and the rich racist basically cries like a little piss-baby about it. I just wish that Tibbs had slapped him harder.
Gillespie, who is also a racist, grows to respect Tibbs and protects him as best he can from the racist trash losers in town. However, don't go thinking this movie is super progressive. It's doing the best it can in 1967. Tibbs has to be THE BEST at his job to even get begrudging respect from Gillespie. And art reflects life: Poitier had to play dignified, intelligent, nearly angelic characters to get respect in Hollywood as a Black man.
In the Heat of the Night is an interesting film, in that it is both dated and forward-thinking simultaneously. It's worth watching for Poitier's stellar performance.
Grade: B+
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Fire of Love
Fire of Love is a documentary about a couple, Katia and Maurice Krafft, who were volcanologists and captured unbelievable footage of active volcanoes before the were both killed by...you guessed it...a volcano in 1991.
The footage in this doc is truly amazing. I only wish I had a larger TV to watch it on. The rest of the movie about Katia and Maurice is not as compelling, so I found the movie beautiful but boring. Definitely recommended for fans of nature documentaries, though.
Grade: B-
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Some Like it Hot
There's a good chance I've reviewed Some Like it Hot on this blog already because I watch it every couple of years. What can I say? It's a classic, and for good reason. Directed by Billy Wilder, and starring Tony Curtis, Jack Lemmon, and Marilyn Monroe, Some Like it Hot is one of--if not the--best comedies of all time.
Also, this movie is SUPER GAY. I mean, there's the cross-dressing aspect, obviously. But even the straight parts of the movie are queer AF. The movie is also funny AF and in a way that still feels fresh over 60 years later.
There's really nothing more to say. If you haven't seen Some Like it Hot, what are you even doing with your life. Go watch it immediately.
Grade: A+
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The Slums of Beverly Hills
This low-key coming of age comedy was my jam when I was a teenager. Directed by Tamara Jenkins and starring everyone's crush, Natasha Lyonne (as well as Marisa Tomei, Alan Arkin, and Jessica Walter), The Slums of Beverly Hills takes place in 1976. Ne'er do well Murray Abromowitz (Arkin) is a poor man who hustles, lies, and cheats for every penny (and has a gambling addiction, which doesn't help). He drags his three kids from cheap apartment to cheap apartment, always staying within Beverly Hills for the good schools.
His daughter, Vivian (Lyonne), is 14 years old and hates this lifestyle. When Murray takes in his niece, Rita (Marisa Tomei), a fellow fuck-up who has been in and out of rehab and has never held down a job, Rita serves as a feminine--and questionable--influence on Vivian.
Although the movie is hilarious, it has a very dark streak. Vivian is surrounded by unstable people right when she needs stability the most. The film has a "family--even fucked up family--is important" message, but that message is shot-through with sadness, given that Murray is not that great of a father. When I was younger, I didn't really feel the heaviness of The Slums of Beverly Hills, but as an adult...woo, baby. Still, it's a great movie with a ton of excellent actors.
Grade: A-
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Jawbreaker
Jawbreaker is a very dark teen comedy that was panned when it came out in 1999, but I think has cult status potential today. The movie stars Judy Greer, Rose McGowan, Rebecca Gayheart...and freakin' Pam Grier (Coffey herself!) as a detective. McGowan, Gayheart, and Julie Benz play Courtney, Julie, and Marcie--popular girls with deep mean streaks. Their clique is rounded out by Liz Purr (Charlotte Ayanna), who is very kind--in addition to being beautiful, rich, and smart--thus universally beloved at Reagan High School, much to the chagrin of Courtney.
On Liz's 17th birthday, the girls kidnap her to take her out for breakfast. However, because Courtney shoves a huge jawbreaker candy in Liz's mouth, Liz chokes to death and the girls have to cover up the accidental death. When deeply unpopular Fern Mayo (Judy Greer) finds out what happened, Courtney offers to make Fern beautiful and popular in exchange for her silence and Fern reluctantly agrees. But when Fern--renamed "Vylette" by Courtney--becomes even more popular than Courtney, things get rough.
Jawbreaker is campy, brutal, and candy-colored. It also has a wicked good soundtrack, with Imperial Teen's "Yoo Hoo" as the cherry on top of this poison pastry of a film. This movie straight up scared the hell out of me when I saw it as a teen because of all the bad behavior and mean girl shenanigans, but as an adult I see the dark humor of it all.
Grade: A-
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Pet Sematary
This 1989 adaptation of Stephen King's horror novel about an indigenous burial ground that resurrects whomever is buried in it is wildly campy, but also has some truly upsetting moments. Directed by Mary Lambert, the movie begins with the Creed family--doctor Louis, wife Rachel, and kids Ellie and Gage--moving to a small town in Maine where Louis takes a job as a physician at the University of Maine.
The family makes the incredibly bad choice of moving to a house near a busy road that a lot of trucks barrel down. Their neighbor, Jud Crandall (played by Herman Munster himself, Fred Gwynne), warns the family to be careful of the road and takes them to a nearby "Pet Sematary" where children have buried their beloved pets over the decades.
When Rachel, Gage, and Ellie are away on a trip, Louis discovers that the family cat, Church, has been run over. Jud takes Louis to a second cemetery hidden beyond the first one and explains that it is the traditional burial ground of the Mi'kmaq people and if you bury an animal in the ground, it will come back. Louis, who can't bear to tell Ellie that Church is dead, buries the feline in the enchanted (or cursed) ground and...sure enough...the cat comes back. Only it's a mean sonofabitch now.
Surprise fucking surprise, can you guess who dies next? That's right--toddler Gage gets hit by a truck, which leads to one of the most honest and devastating scenes in the movie: Louis' father-in-law, who already hates him, insults him at his own son's funeral and Louis punches the motherfucker. Even though Pet Sematary is filled with campy special effects and make-up, I have to say that its approach to death and grief is on the money. People react to grief in pretty wild ways, so this funeral-punching scene, while dramatic, felt pretty honest.
Of course, dumbass Louis puts Gage in the burial ground and Gage comes back as a little monster who wants to kill everyone. Whatever animatronics or effects they used for killer Gage was...not great and inadvertently made the final part of the movie hilarious. But I feel like the horror of Pet Sematary isn't the killer zombie toddler, but about how people CANNOT deal with death. There is a conflict that sets off the entire chain of events between Louis and Rachel: Rachel doesn't want to have an honest conversation with their daughter Ellie about death, which inspires Louis to bring Church back to life (thus, learning about the power of the Mi'kmaq burial ground) rather than, um, teach a 7 year old about death.
So, the real horror of Pet Sematary is bad parenting and adults not facing their own trauma, thus passing it on to their children. King is really good at writing about trauma and bad parenting. It doesn't always translate well to the big screen, but the overall idea behind Pet Sematary is excellent. The movie is...ok. But I think I'm going to check out the book.
Grade: B-
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The Advent Calendar
The Advent Calendar is a Shudder original film about a wheelchair-bound woman who is gifted an old, wooden advent calendar that a friend stole from a German flea market. When they open it, the calendar presents them with a set of rules: if you dump the calendar, you'll die. If you eat the first piece of candy, you have to eat all the candy in the calendar. And you have to follow the commands of the calendar or you'll die.
Main character Eva discovers that by following the rules of the calendar, wonderful things happen: she gets immediately rich through investing, she is able to make a man fall wildly in love with her, and most importantly, she can walk again. Since Eva was a dancer before her accident, the ability to walk again is truly a miracle to her. But--no shocker here--it all comes at a terrible, murderous price.
This was a fine movie to while away an evening, but it's nothing to write home about. Like most Shudder originals, it's good, but not great.
Grade: B-
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The Special
The Special is a movie where a guy, Jerry, is dragged to a brothel by a friend and given "the special"--literally a box you stick your dick into. Whatever is in that box is SO amazing and insanely orgasm-inducing that Jerry is willing to commit crimes--including murder--to put his johnson in it again. He steals the box and what follows is some of the most disgusting body horror I've ever seen. It's kind of like David Cronenberg's The Fly, if The Fly was a very bad movie about a guy sticking his junk into a box.
This is a TERRIBLE movie. The acting is laughable, the dialogue is horrendous, the plot is ludicrous. The whole thing is so amateur, it hurts. But it's also entertaining because it's about a guy sticking his hog into a mysterious box. How would that not be entertaining?
Watch at your own risk of either being disgusted by the body horror or the bad dialogue.
Grade: D+
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The Apology
Another Shudder original, The Apology stars Anna Gunn (better known as Skyler White from Breaking Bad) as Darlene, recovering alcoholic whose daughter went missing twenty years prior. She is preparing to host Christmas at her house for the first time since her daughter's disappearance, but Darlene is far from ok. She is still holding out hope that her daughter will someday be found.
Just as Darlene is about to break her 19 years of sobriety with a good bottle of vodka, she hears a knock on the door. It's her ex brother-in-law Jack (Linus Roache) who claims his car broke down a few streets over. He was planning on coming to Christmas as a surprise. As Jack and Darlene catch-up, the conversation takes a dark turn when Jack reveals that he knows something about Darlene's daughter's disappearance and wants to alleviate some of Darlene's suffering by telling her what he knows. But will the revelations break Darlene? Or empower her to move on? You'll have to watch to find out!
The Apology is a solid thriller that rests entirely on Anna Gunn and Linus Roache's shoulders (Janeane Garofalo has a wonderful supporting role as Darlene's neighbor and best friend, Gretchen). Gunn is just wonderful as a woman whose guilt and complicated grief have held her back for 20 years. She portrays emotional agony and rage so well (I've always been annoyed at how viewers hated her character in Breaking Bad while loving Bryan Cranston's character. That's misogyny, folks!). Roache is perfect as a selfish scumbag. The Apology is not a feel-good movie at all, and in fact my anxiety was palpable throughout the whole movie. So watch at your own emotional risk!
Grade: B
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